| Jealousy - it is sometimes referred to as "the | | | | does. Why? |
| green-eyed monster", and not without reason. This | | | | Well, in essence it is very simple. The person who |
| little monster can poison relationships like no other - | | | | acts from jealousy, belittling other peoples |
| between spouses, between friends, co-workers and | | | | expressions of beauty is unable or unwilling to |
| family members. | | | | acknowledge their own pain. They may be |
| But what exactly is jealousy seen from a spiritual | | | | subconsciously terrified of their pain. They may even |
| perspective? How can we recognize the signs of the | | | | think they cannot survive if they feel it. So the pain |
| green-eyed monster, either in ourselves or others? | | | | has to be projected outward as soon as possible, |
| And how can we tame it once we have discovered | | | | before the hurt can surface. So the venom that |
| it? | | | | wounded their own heart is quickly transformed into |
| Jealousy is one of the most destructive dynamics I | | | | poisonous words, harsh criticisms, and rejections. |
| have found at the heart of poisoned human | | | | That which is beautiful must be destroyed, in a way, |
| relationships in my therapy practice. I have seen | | | | so the hurt will go away. It does not matter whether |
| mothers being jealous of their daughters, doing | | | | the object of beauty is a person or a work of art; |
| anything in their power to break them and hold them | | | | the mechanism remains the same. |
| back. I have seen teachers being jealous of their | | | | Now, I said this is really an expression of the illusion |
| pupils, degrading them to make them feel inadequate. | | | | of separation. How does that work? |
| I have seen it at work between people in a variety | | | | Well, to be wounded in the heart, to have been |
| of situations, from bullying at school and in the office, | | | | learnt to doubt, maim or kill your own inner beauty, |
| to the social stigmatizing of ethnic groups. | | | | you must have had beauty in the first place. You |
| But what exactly IS jealousy? Let us examine | | | | cannot be jealous of something you can't see, can't |
| jealousy from both sides of the coin: from the | | | | recognize for what it is. In other words, what you |
| viewpoint of the one who is jealous, and from the | | | | are really jealous of is an aspect of yourself. The |
| one who is experiencing the jealousy of others. | | | | beauty the jealous person sees is not separate from |
| Because, as we will find, one cannot exist without | | | | them. It was merely wounded. What they have to |
| the other. | | | | do is acknowledge the pain, revive their own beauty |
| When you are experiencing jealousy, what you are in | | | | and heal their own heart. This, of course can seem |
| fact experiencing is the illusion of separation. Does | | | | like a daunting task. It takes humility, self-knowledge |
| this sound strange to you? I will explain! | | | | and guts to acknowledge and heal your own pain. |
| Say you see someone performing in one of the arts. | | | | Many of us don't even attempt it. |
| Say this person is a painter. She can paint pictures | | | | What of the person who experiences jealousy? The |
| that take away your breath and stop your heart | | | | other side of the coin, the person who regularly |
| with their beauty. Now many people will be able to | | | | attracts jealous people was often hurt in the same |
| enjoy her paintings. But some will be jealous. Why? | | | | way. But instead of letting the poison build up inside |
| Well, on closer examination you will find that those | | | | and turning it outward, these people did set out to |
| who are jealous do have the ability to see the | | | | manifest beauty anyway. However the poison, the |
| beauty in the paintings. However, seeing this beauty | | | | pain from the past did not go away. |
| does not bring them joy. It brings them pain. Why? | | | | So where the jealous person projects the poison |
| Because somehow, for some reason, they have | | | | outward, the person who experiences jealousy |
| started to doubt their own ability to create beauty. | | | | through others has taken it inward, doubting their |
| It may have been a strict father. It may have been | | | | own accomplishments and their worth. Often, this is |
| a harsh teacher. But someone, somewhere down the | | | | also subconscious. The harsh, critical voices from the |
| line, these people were wounded in the heart. Now, | | | | past have been hidden and stored away. But they |
| some people that are wounded in this way will do | | | | can't be kept hidden forever. The destructive voices |
| not get jealous. They may doubt themselves, they | | | | from the past will haunt them through those that are |
| may be crippled in their own ability to create, but | | | | jealous, until they deal with the pain, heal their hearts |
| they will not feel envy or spite, and try to belittle | | | | and recognize their full beauty and potential. |
| other people's accomplishments. The jealous person | | | | Just like the jealous! |